Mar 27

Prolonged Grief

A friend sent me this article recently, and I am not a huge reader, but really take a minute and read it:

https://www.desiringgod.org/articles/what-god-says-to-your-tears

The phrase in there “prolonged grieving” is one that I have been chewing over a lot lately. I think because at times I feel a tinge of guilt about the fact that grief wasn’t just a few days or months for me, but that i’m nearing my baby girl’s 5th birthday, and at times the grief feels just as fresh. The world and the people in it at times make me feel crazy or ungrateful or sad, and although I am all of those things {as we all are whether we want to admit it or not}, it’s okay that grief still strikes.

In a culture that prizes strength and grows uncomfortable with prolonged grieving, many of us respond to our own tears with a hasty wipe of the sleeve and a quick “Get over it.”

The last few weeks I have witnessed a dear friend have a miscarriage, watched my mom have a major surgery, celebrated my birthday, learned of a family in town who lost a baby with a similar story to ours, and all the while I have been trying to prepare my heart for Easter.

I am just Tired.

I just want to keep re-reading this article, because I do agree through my own grief that the world does make you seem weak if you can’t “get over it”, and people there are things that we experience in life that we just don’t “get over”.

A dear friend texted me the morning of Mary Anna’s first birthday with these words:

His mercies are new every morning… even today

When days or weeks like this hit, I say that to myself… even today. It’s so easy to get lost in the hard things of life that we neglect his mercy.

I told my friend the morning of her miscarriage to listen to this song:

That theme keeps popping up. So, as I prepare my heart and my kids for Jesus’ dark and gloomy death, and then the glorious resurrection, I see his mercy more clearly. It doesn’t negate the dark times and the fear and the tears that even Jesus {yes God himself} experienced, but it does mean that his mercy is new every morning… even today.

Whatever your today may be, I hope that you feel his mercy, and I hope that you feel the freedom to walk through whatever it is and not feel ashamed of your tears.

You do not want a sacrifice, or I would give it;
you are not pleased with a burnt offering.
The sacrifice pleasing to God is a broken spirit.
You will not despise a broken and a humble heart, God.
Psalm 51:16-17

Keep Walking.