Sep 13

Choices

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I love the saying the struggle is real

Like today when I tried to do the simple task of grabbing some groceries, and Mary Kathryn (3 months) was asleep, and William (2) was already requesting a certain cart in the parking lot. I put the itty in the ergo baby carrier, and grabbed the shoeless toddler, and I walked up to the store, and some nice lady was like can I help you??. I kinda giggled and said no I really am okay, but I was thinking man the struggle is REAL.

Choices…

We have them everyday. Big and small. I chose tp eat William’s soggy pancakes this morning, because I was still hungry, and I mean that’s just motherhood. I chose to make another cup of coffee during nap time and write instead of taking a nap myself, because I just needed it today. I chose to go to the grocery store instead of this new delivery thing…

Can we take a moment? They deliver your groceries, bring them in your house, and set them on your counter top! Hello! Can I get an AMEN?

Yeah, I was going to sign up today, but they charge extra for groceries, and again, we make the choice for me to stay at home, so I loaded up the troops and got my groceries myself. The budget is real too y’all.

I choose marriage. I choose my husband. Today in a culture of divorce and half done marriages, I wake up and choose him. Even on the days when he looks at me and says, you know I think I really do get on your nerves! Haha! He does, but I choose him.

And let me take a note that Dan and I made the choice for me to stay at home, and although it may seem glamorous, it is not a choice of out plenty. If any, it is a choice that brings great need. It was a choice we made for our family. William tells me a lot mommy car break, because my car seems to be struggling, and I laugh and say yes buddy, but mommy car break so she can stay with buddy. He usually responds yeah.

He says yeah a lot.

We have been given this grand task from our pastor to work on our life’s mission, and as I contemplate that, it has brought up why I am doing what I am doing, and so it has then even further to spot light my choices. I think to narrow down this mission that he speaks of, I have to know why I choose what I choose.

So today…

I choose Dan the man.

I choose Mary Anna, William, and Mary Kathryn.

I choose to pray more and read more.

I choose to stay at home and flourish at home.

I choose to drink coffee a lot.

I choose yoga pants more than jeans. because… yeah…

I choose to enjoy feeding my family.

I choose life.

I choose a lot of things and this list will continue to grow… But I think it’s just dawned on me to remind ourselves what we choose, and why we choose those things, because in a fast-paced grocery delivering, instagram shopping world, it easy to not choose the right things.

Most importantly, I choose Jesus.

Dan decided we should read Psalms together and read a new chapter everyday. Well I forgot to read day 1-3, so I read those last night, but I chose to make myself read chapter 4 this morning, before I made up 5 million excuses of why I was too busy to do such a thing…

Answer me when I call to you,
O my righteous God.
Give me relief from my distress;
be merciful to me and hear my prayer.

How long, O men, will you turn my glory
into shame?
How long will you love delusions and 
seek false gods?
Know that the Lord has set apart the godly
for himself;
the Lord will hear when I call to him.

In your anger do not sin;
when you are on your beds,
search your hearts and be silent.
Offer right sacrifices
and trust in the Lord.

Many are asking, “Who can show us any
good?’
Let the light of your face shine upon us,
O Lord.
You have filled my heart with greater joy
than when their grain and new wine
abound.
I will lie down and sleep in peace,
for you alone, O Lord,
make me dwell in safety.
Psalms 4

And after I finished I texted him this: Know the Lord will hear when I call… Reminded me that HE does hear our prayers. Man I need to be praying more.

Keep Walking